The New Millennium Woman
Recently, a gargantuan Man Mountain (MM) steamrolled into my office. In tow, was petite, purdah-clad woman molehill. I waved them in and gestured for them to sit down. Yet, both remained standing. When I looked quizzically at them, the lady explained that the chair offered was too small for her husband. He was over six feet tall and weighted about 320 lbs. The other chair was capaciously adequate for the lady though, but yet she chose to remain standing, seemingly in deference to his 'highness'. I apologized profusely and promised to order some XXL chairs soon. This was the first time ever in my career that the need for one had been experienced. Ms Petite said it was all right and that they were used to this. Few places had chairs large enough to accommodate her husband, she said. I realized then that she was the interpreter. The man, it appeared, was from gain One organ lose another land, and understood only one language (any pub entirely imagined). He was extremely unhappy to stand and stared at me belligerently throughout the remainder of the consultation.
'Yes ma'am,' I began, 'What may I do for you?'
'What andrological problem?' I goaded instead.
I'd been through such awkward encounters before and didn't want to embarrass Ms Petite any further. I requested her to step out of my office and sit in the waiting room for a moment. The instant she left the room, I swung with gusto into andrological sign language. This is the one universal language that all men understand, and especially MM, I was willing to bet.
Using a skilled combination of some practiced gesticulation and rebuses, I had his entire medical history unraveled in a few minutes without uttering a word. Yet he was unimpressed. Macho guy, I thought to myself. Either that or imbecile as hell.
A physical examination on MM revealed that he had the genital size of a ten-year-old boy and pre-pubertal blood testosterone levels. He was unable to even furnish a sample of semen for analysis.
MM had told this third wife that he left his first two wives because they couldn't bear him children in spite of a normal sex real life and real life with him. this could not be true. With Penis Transplants and testes that small, it was extremely unlikely that he had had sex with his earlier wives. He was lying. Also, he had never undergone any previous examination or tests for infertility. Now he was blaming Ms Petite for not being able to do it for him! I wondered how he agreed to come to my office in the first place. Either he must think that doctors are stupid or, that petite lady must be only deceptively meek, I concluded. She might have been the one who tricked him into visiting me.
'So what's new?' I though to my self help is the best help. I see cases like these quite commonly. It is quite sad to note how women are blamed for all sexual problems among couples even today when all scientific studies indicate otherwise. Today, it is very well known that fifty percent of all childlessness is male factor related. We also know that a woman cannot be responsible for a man's impotence unless the man finds her extremely unattractive, or the women has the track record of Lorena Bobbitt. It seems to be in the interest of some societies and cultures to perpetrate falsehoods about women. What the perpetrators don't realize is that, unfortunately, this is not going to solve the problem. It only delays the inevitable and makes matters worse.
In some ancient cultures it was acceptable for men to hand their wives if they failed to produce offspring. In Regency England a man could publicly denounce his wife if didn't beget an heir. Queen Mary of England was referred to disparagingly as 'The Barren Queen'. Henry VIII went through several wives in quest of a son. Louis XVL, king of France and Spouse of the sensual Marie Antoinette, suffered from infertility. Still, for years the people of France angrily blamed the 'Austrian whore' for not producing an heir and instructed her to 'properly perform' her duties. Closer home, India is world famous for infertility related bride burning. The list is endless.
Modern day infertile women are forced to suffer some of the same indignities that women throughout history have been forced to endure, and Ms Petite seemed no exception.
With andrologic treatment , MM showed a slight increase in the size of the penis, and was able to have some kind of sexual intercourse (for the first time ) but he would never sire a child. His testes were unresponsive to all treatment and would never produce sperms.
Approximately fifteen to twenty percent of all couples are infertile, that is, childless. In nearly half of these, it is the male factor that is responsible for the wife's inability to conceive. This means that 7.5 to ten percent of men are infertile.
Even in the ironical Indian context of one billion people, that makes male infertility a very serious issue.
It's about time that men woke up to this reality. The sexually liberated, economically independent woman is already here. With a pick of both available men and mind-blowing gizmos, she doesn't need an MCP husband for sexual gratification . moreover, she can just walk in to a sperm bank with her gold card and eugenically choose between the sperm equivalents of a Schwarzenegger or an Einstein if she wants a baby.
A sad end to male chauvinism, perhaps, but a good beginning for female emancipation and infertility in general.