A lovely girl

A Rotten Night’s Sleep

A Shocking

A Shudder

A Side-Turning

A Struggling

All This Mainlining On Words

Cabinet Mirror

Catha Suddenly

Face Up

Fair Enough

Fair- Mindedness

Flying Buttress  in Bronze

For Chrissake

Fuel Cables

Full Of Echo's

Gold Chain Around His Neck

Half- Stefan Crossing

Having To Work


I Never Went Back

I Want To See You

In a Minute

In Frankfurt

In Hertfordshire

In Marxist

I could feel his tongue in my ear.

In Sussex

John Marx Stefanovitch


Kiss the envelope  for luck

Letter from Alison to Stefan

Letter  from Stefan to Alison

Listen Darling

Malleus malefactum

Mmmm’ Noises.

Mortality In Relation

My Beloved

Nancy Friday

‘Observe the wolf pack.

Our Relationship

Out- Stretched

Own Glass Still

All This Mainlining On Words

‘You won’t  escape me again.’
Obviously the first thing I must in my ear do was hide my passport.  I would give  it to Catha.
‘When did I say  wanted to?’
‘If you don’t come with me of hour own free will I’ll have abducted later.’  He made  it sound alarmingly easy.
‘What’s free will got to do with it?’  Now his arm and leg felt heavy on me.
‘I’d  attend to the arrangements, of course, but I wouldn’t  do it  myself.  I’d  contract  the business out.’  He rolled  away from me and spoke to the ceiling as though computing the cost of an abduction in pounds and pence. 
‘You’re being bloody ridiculous.’
‘Sorry, darling.’  His voice was leveling out as mine was rising.  ‘But  I’d risk anything for you.’  He lifted my hand and soul love began to lick in the spaces between my fingers.  ‘You taste salty.  You and the sea.’
I was not going to be side-tracked.  ‘You push your own  little empire to the edge of the precipice, contemplate its ruin, then glance over your shoulder and see mine still intact.  Too much for you to bear.  In affairs of the heart, Stefan, you’re  the mentality of a vandal.’
‘Sorry, darling.’  He laughed  and enjoyed laughing.  ‘But  I warned you about street crime.  Seriously though, I’ve  never known  a woman with your insight into me.’
He stared hard at me as though waiting for further  revelation.
I stared back coldly.’  And I’ve  never known  another man who managed to combine  the two extremes of thus  and poet.’
‘And which do you love the most, the thug  or the poet?’
My gaze wavered.  I had to look away.  ‘All this mainlining on words,’ I said  but my beloved voice had softened.  ‘You even jerk off on my vocabulary.’
In fact I felt so exploited I began to cry.
He pretended not to notice my tears.  ‘OK then.  To the practicalities….’
‘But Stefan, if you abducted me,’ I wept, ‘I wouldn’t  love you any move.’
‘conditioning would soon correct that.  No animal, and we are animals in this respect, has ever proved capable of resisting the conditioning  of reflexive  response in a controlled  environment.’
‘Do you realize  what you’re saying?’
‘I’ve  warned you.  Now, you’ve given your notice in at  the agency  anyway.  You haven’t yet signed contract  for your new offices.  Ring  Julia.  She can take care of the  sale of the lease on your flat.’
Julia was Stefan’s experience-wife, his second.  He had   strictly  absented himself from her life for a year, so she had had time to recover from that negation of self, stefan had explained, that  she had suffered under the parabola of his personality.  Then he had taken a gentle proprietoral interest in her life.  She had married a kind man, much kinder than Stefan had been, he said, and he was  pleased for her. But Roy  was a bit of a fool.  And Stefan had recently persuaded Julia to open up her own bank account in which to siphon  off some of her housekeeping etc.- which was excessive – so she need never  be dependent on a man again, as she had been on him,  he said.  He was  at present advising  her on something   safe-life gilt-edged.
‘Why should I bother Julia?’ I protested.
‘She likes to help.  She admires you.  You’re so much tougher than she is.’
I felt miserable.  I admired Julia for her  softness.  And her enormous breasts.  In fact the first time I met her I felt so inferior about mine that I hated myself for a whole week for being so simplistic as to care.  Worse, I displayed real feminine petty-mindedness by asking Stefan if he minded mine being average.  He said he had been cured of tits by living with julia.  Almost.  Ultimately they got in the way.  I supposed this was his idea of being chivalrous.  But it is awful the way the embarrassments of a first introduction can linger.
‘I like her too.  But now she’s got the baby.  ‘Her breasts had become even bigger since giving birth.
‘Precisely.  So it seems a shame for her to put her marriage  in jeopardy at this point.  Fact is she’s got herself  involved with some guy called Seymour.  He’s  obviously attractive and a  good lover, but in other respects bad news.  She’s in quite a state over it.  as you know she’s   not the most self-aware person.  You could help her.   I’d  like you to have a talk.  Sort out this Seymour bloke.  Though I wouldn’t get too entangled with him  yourself.’  He kissed me briefly before taking a leftover  from the trolley.  ‘But then you won’t have the time, will you?  I must  finish packing.’
I was intrigued.  I watched him cross to the bathroom. our relationship While he was away I would ring  Julia about Seymour.  I would ring Catha about subletting the new  lease on my flat and move in with her so that it would be difficult for Stefan ever to find me when he came back.  On second thoughts, since I just had time to get back to my flat now and  change, I would go to the concert Catha had asked me to attend and speak to her direct.

By the time I reached  the concert  hall I felt pretty wrecked , and yet Catha said I looked radiant and had I sneaked in a lovely holiday, or what?  That was when I began to feel guilty.  Now the concert  was over and we had socio economic  repaired to the pub next door, I felt more relaxed  though  a bit worried because  I had not heard much of the music.  My concentration had been too wrap in Stefan.



Remember celebrating

Seafood Filling



Seymour Warned


Socio Economic

Soul Love

Stefan to Alison

Stefan winked.


Stefanovitch speaking

Straggers Backwards

The Best Nurturing

The Heart of Paris

The Insidiousness

The Myth of the Vaginal Orgasm,

The Priest and the Penitent

The Shutters

The Sorbonne

Then Leave It

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